Spring break is a beacon of hope for college students everywhere. The weather is starting to get warmer, spring is springing, and you get a much needed break from midterms and papers and the ever-present desire to cry and rip all of your hair out. For many college students, spring break also means “go to a tropical island and get really drunk with all my friends week.” And that is awesome — who wouldn’t want to spend a whole week on a tropical island getting really drunk with all of their friends during that precious mid-semester week off?
Actually, I don’t. Maybe it is a different type of senioritis, but I can think of about a zillion other ways I would rather to spend my spring break. All of them free and most of them boring. I would love to be “tanning” and sipping pina coladass in the Bahamas, but who would wade through my remaining pile of homework, fill in for me in my job at an ice cream store, and clean my room while I was gone? The tropical getaway SB probably delivers the best in terms of immediate relief, but isn’t the best long term solution for your sanity in the weeks leading up to summer.
Did I just say that? I really don’t know who I am anymore, wow. If you feel like a member of the retired party person club, feel no shame. If you feel like you are a 21-year-old trapped in your grandmother’s body -eg you spent an inordinate amount of time searching for the best deals on cheap college textbooks – this is probably what your spring break will look like (P.S., if you want to feel less lame when you realize this is the story of your life, avoid looking at your peer’s spring break photos on Facebook for about a week; resist the stalking temptations.)
Woo hoo! Spring break! Time to partyyyyyy.
Just looking at that GIF is making me feel queasy and exhausted…
Lol jk, time to get the first full night’s sleep in forever. #tooturnt
The only thing you’re drinking the first few nights of freedom is tea
…Hot toddy style if you are feeling adventurous.
Because Netflix.
And pizza.
A few days of blissful nothingness go by, and you feel like maybe you should do something.
Homework? Cleaning? Or..
By around Thursday/Friday, you may be ready for some more traditional spring break-tivities…
…AKA drinking.
You get yourself all pampered and ready
…and somehow manage to drag your old achey bones out to the bar/club/someplace other than your room.
You slam back a few drinks, but instead of feeling like you want to dance on a table, you just feel like you want to dance into your bed.
Hmm, maybe you just aren’t equipped for nightlife at the moment.
Being fun is exhausting.
Take two: the next night, you just have your friends come to you.
Your friends can be actual human friends, or just cheap bottles of wine. If you have both human and wine friends, you win.
As you are stalking your friends tropical getaway pics, you may question whether or not your are satisfied with how you spent your break.
But when Monday rolls around, you realize you actually feel more refreshed than you have in a while.
And hey, only a few weeks until summer. And even “old” college students party like crazy in the summer.