Let me get something straight here. I’m trying really hard to study because I have done a minimal amount of work this semester so now I need to study and get good marks somebody help me please wait seriously what do I do…
What was I saying?
Right. I’m trying really hard to be a good student and you know what you do? You freaking post the following on Facebook / Twitter / Instagram / Instagram connected to Facebook and Twitter (so I have to see the same post three times across three different platforms)?! That’s not okay. And yes, I have tried to deactivate my social media accounts, but I’ve learned that it causes even more panic because I’m addicted to social media. (I’ll work on that later.)
Excuse me, ain’t nobody got time for your Italian Chicken Parmesan, okay? I’m trying to get through multiple chapters with the single goal of cramming information into my brain long enough to write this exam (and hopefully beyond.) I haven’t eaten anything except Goldfish crackers and Teddy Grahams for like four days. Yesterday, I had to remind myself how to boil water to make tea. Stop making my life harder than it already is!
2. Cute Animals
Don’t get me wrong – I love cute animals. I have been known to stare at my screen for hours, just clicking through image rolls of cute animals. That’s the exact problem! Please understand that my focus can be set on literally anything except my studies right now. If you’re going to post a picture of a cute animal, at least save the file and then post the picture. That way, I can’t keep hitting my right arrow to see more and more pictures of cute animals. Thanks.
3. Gorgeous Selfies
I’m gaining a pound a day and am currently living in sweatpants. Please don’t remind me that I’ll have to clean up at some point. Heck, I look at my own selfies and feel bad.
So on that note…
Featured photo via Thinkstock