Who needs alcohol when you have Twitter?
Wait, actually though. Some of the accounts that I follow are entertaining enough that I don’t need alcohol. Alternatively, somebody posted them while drunk, so the entertainment factor is still way up there. So if you need a break but can’t afford the hangover, you should be following these Twitter accounts.
turtleneck so high can’t see my haters
— no (@umsassy) April 24, 2014
i like my eyeliner to be as dark as my soul
— no (@umsassy) April 21, 2014
Your daily dose of sass, delivered in 140 characters or less. If you’re like me and you think mean things but are too afraid to say them out loud (and definitely too scared to post them on Twitter), @umsassy is exactly what you need. It’s almost like having a sassy best friend who speaks your mind, but without real-life conversations, a face, or punctuation marks. That last one is usually a deal-breaker for me, but in this case, I’m willing to make an exception.
Got milk? pic.twitter.com/exRpHo3C2d
— Cute Overloads (@CuteOverloads) April 27, 2014
This is my favorite of the “Cute ” accounts because the pictures are uploaded directly to Twitter instead of being passed through a third party service. This means that the previews show up on your feed and you don’t need to invest time into clicking links and returning back to your feed. Every time you scroll through your feed, it’s like a little surprise of cute! Isn’t that great?! Okay fine, I’m easily entertained, but just look at that dog’s face…
damn girl are you a pizza at a Chinese buffet because I’m not feeling it right now but I see u over there doing u and I respect that — k (@ughposts) April 26, 2014
do u ever leave ur phone for like an hour and expect to come back to like 60 texts but u get none yeah same — k (@ughposts) April 25, 2014
This is one of the more underrated sass accounts out there. I don’t know why. Yes, whoever is behind this account retweets from other sass accounts, but the original content is impressive. Teehee. Still no punctuation marks though.
— CampusRiot (@SurvivinCollege) April 28, 2014
— CampusRiot (@SurvivinCollege) April 25, 2014
If you’re not following us by now, get with it. Click “Follow” on that ish! We keep you in the loop.
What’s your favorite Twitter account?
Featured photo via Thinkstock