Chynna Mela is a senior journalism student at Temple University and an SC Campus Representative. She can usually be found planning her fall wedding to Harry Styles, attempting to become the female version of Perez Hilton, or eating peanut butter straight from the jar. See more posts from her here.


 

Welcome to Temple University! Home of the T for Temple U chant, sitting by the Bell Tower enjoying the beautiful greenery, and one of the largest computer labs in the nation! At least that is what a glossy pamphlet from the admissions office would want you to think. However, I’ve spent quite a few years as a Temple student, and I know what sets us apart from the rest. The real traits of a Temple student. The facts that really matter. Put down your 3,000 calorie loaded tray from Jnh, find a reliable location for wifi (lol, 98% wireless campus!!!), and have a laugh at the facts only Temple students know to be true.

The words “spring fling” make your blood boil

Temple University Spring Fling

(Photo via philly.barstoolsports)

The third Wednesday of April may have just been another miserable Hump Day for everyone else, but for Temple owls..it was THE day of the year. Spring. Fling. A day that began as a celebration of the various clubs and organizations on campus (with a free concert at night) turned into a day of skipping class and enjoying a beverage…or two. Okay, or three. During my glory days I would check the syllabi of my potential classes while registering to check if the professor had an exam or major project scheduled to be due on the day of Spring Fling. I actually changed classes once because of it. Unfortunately in light of a terrible event Spring Fling has been cancelled (though Temple officials claim the end of Spring Fling had been approaching for quite some time), and the third Wednesday of April is a now dark, dark day.

You can distinguish a real homeless person from an impostor in less than 2 seconds

Chatty Man Alan Carr Bullshit

(GIF via Giphy)

Look, we go to school in North Philadelphia. Temple isn’t in a college town. It’s right smack in the middle of a not so great area. Homeless people are everywhere, and so are people pretending to be homeless. They guy that stands outside 7/11 on Liacouras? Not homeless. He has asked me to spare some change for five and a half years. His shoes are nicer than mine, but I have a soft spot for him and hand him whatever is in my pockets. The lady that pretends she “lost her Septa pass and is stranded?” Yeah, don’t give her money. I fell for that my freshman year and gave her my last two bucks. Ten minutes later I saw her walking out of 7/11 with a bag of Doritos and a Arizona Iced Tea. Liar.

You don’t know how to spell Liacouras

Kids Spelling Mickey Mouse GIF

(GIF via Giphy)

Liacouras Walk is the main strip on Temple’s campus, and if you’re going anywhere you pass right through it. It’s the home of a bar, Chinese food, dorm, coffee shop, bank, etc. You name it, Liacouras has it. Every time I have to put that word in writing I’m stumped. I would be more embarrassed about this if when I turned to the person next to me and asked them how to spell it they didn’t shrug and say “Heck if I know.” (Yes, I did have to Google how to spell it. Lay off)

WGW holds a special place in your heart

 

White Girl Wednesday (WGW) is an event held by local bar The Draught Horse every Wednesday. It’s essentially a night a bar makes a killing by selling excessive amounts of dollar beers to college kids saving their change every week. It’s a little slice of heaven.

You plan on naming your first born “Richie”

Richies Temple University

(Image via temple-news)

Richie Jr. is the Emeril Lagasse of Temple’s campus. At any point of the day there are 15-20 students waiting for Richie to bless them with the godsend that is his food. After an all nighter I would find myself crawling to him to bring me back to life with a breakfast sandwich and massive coffee. (Hint: Try a breakfast wrap. You won’t regret devouring its egg, sausage, hash brown, and hot sauce deliciousness one little bit.)

You’ve given a security guard a look of death

Zach Braff Scrubs Look of Death Angry

(GIF via Giphy)

Here’s the thing. If the security guards people that check IDs when they aren’t too busy talking on their bluetooth actually LOOKED at my ID after they request it I would understand. However, one too many times I have spent five minutes digging my Owl Card out of my bag, and when I finally thrust it in the air in triumph, they don’t even look at it. I am very busy. I have a lot of Snapchats to send and a lot of photos of Harry Styles’ hair to save to my camera roll. I can’t be bothered with these time wasting activities.

You fear squirrels

Christmas Vacation Squirrel

(GIF via Giphy)

Someone must be feeding them steroids. I am already deathly afraid of squirrels, and the ones the inhabit Temple take my fear to an entirely new level. They are the biggest, meanest and bravest squirrels in the entire world and they pop out of trashcans like a jack in the box successfully giving me heart failure at least twice a week.

You’d kill to see security camera footage from Temple Star

Jersey Shore Chinese Food

(GIF via Giphy)

Just maybe not footage that involves you last Saturday night buying 16 pizza rolls, sitting on the floor and eating them one by one after dipping them in duck sauce. Oops.

You’ve sat in a really, really big chair

Temple University Big Chairs

(GIF via mariocorsarojournalism.wordpress.)

I’m still not really sure what purpose they serve, but they’re kind of cool I guess.

What sets you apart as a Temple Owl?


(Featured Image via facebook)